Before I die ….
I recently read about a global art project started by the artist Candy Chang in which she created a space on a public wall with the prompt “before I die_______. The idea came to her after the death of someone she loved and was imagined as a way for people to reflect on life and death.
It took only a matter of days for the entire wall to be filled with answers. Some that might be considered things on one's “bucket list”: traveling to all the continents, straddling the international date line. Others were more simple desires: to be a good dad, to have a better relationship with my sister.
While they all seem feasible and attainable, we tend to put things off for the future, when we have more time or more money. We dream without doing. When death feels a long way off, it’s easy to say “tomorrow”.
It feels like it's only when we think about the end that we give ourselves the lens to articulate what we really want in our life. If so, how can we keep our mortality top of mind? Not to bring us down, but to help us be bold and brave enough to start to tackle the “bucket list”?
If you were told today that you had only a few short months left, what would you change? How might you approach the decisions you make? Giving ourselves the time and space to think about our death can shed light on how to live in the present with more authenticity and purpose, how to make the most of our finite time, and in the end, create the legacy we’d be most proud of.
How would you finish the sentence, “before I die I want to________”?
If you’re interested in giving yourself the time and space to think about it, check out our fall Peace of Mind Planning Workshop.
Don’t miss out! Peace of Mind Planning Workshops – Fall 2024
Our next Peace of Mind Planning workshop is coming up. Find more information and register here.
For a little bit of a deeper dive, here’s what we will cover in each session:
Session 1: What it means to have a “good death” + completing your Advance Directive Session 2: Everything you wanted to know about body disposition + how do you want to be celebrated and remembered? Session 3: Putting together your Life File + having hard conversations with your older loved ones Session 4: Caregiving + the dying experience
We added Session 4 after learning that many folks were concerned about how to navigate the often emotional and stressful caregiving responsibilities for their parents or partners at the end of life. Which is not surprising – did you know that over 37 million Americans provide unpaid elder care annually? That number continues to increase as the boomer generation is aging.
Also, know that if the price of the workshop is cost prohibitive, we can definitely offer it to you at a reduced rate. We’re passionate about getting this content to people who are eager to participate. Just reach out to jen@theheartwoodcollective.com.
Hope to see you on Zoom or in-person in October! Please share with anyone you feel would be interested.
Karen & Jen
Speaking of caregiving….
We found this piece by Courtney Martin about the art of caregiving incredibly beautiful and insightful. Courtney writes a substack called The Examined Family about many things, including caring for her father who has dementia.
Also, I (Karen) recently finished We All Want Impossible Things at Jen’s recommendation. A gut-punch of a novel about a woman caring for her friend in hospice, that is also very funny and a bit crass. For your To-Read List.
Register now! Peace of Mind Planning Workshops – Fall 2024
We’re excited to announce our next sessions of the Peace of Mind Planning Workshop. This fall, we’ll run the workshop both in-person, if you’re in Portland, and via Zoom. Find more information and register here.
Each session we’ll talk about life, death, and our mortality. We’ll guide you through the necessary paperwork to get your affairs in order, and offer advice on how to talk with older loved ones in your life about their preparation.
This spring we completed our inaugural class. We were sold out! Folks told us they liked the interactive format of the workshop, which included sharing, writing prompts, and group discussions that created a supportive atmosphere where everyone could learn from each others’ perspectives, and personal stories. Conversations were meaningful, sometimes funny, and always rich.
Feel free to reach out directly with any questions, and please forward this email to anyone who may be interested in the workshop!